Amish Secret is yet another furniture polish that tries to associate itself with the Amish people. They claim this formula was developed to “honor the Amish heritage of fine craftsmanship” and cleans any wood surface with just one wipe. But HOW?
Amish Secret is sold by Telebrands, who sell a ton of other infomercial products. This particular furniture polish appears to be a re-branding of Olde Amish, which they claimed was a 100-year-old formula. Along with the new label, they slightly tweaked their pitch (possibly to prevent a lawsuit).
The Amish Secret Pitch
The claim-to-fame for this (and other similar furniture products like Dutch Glow) its its association with the Amish people. (You know, that Christian sect based in the Midwest where the men have long beards and they reject modern technology.)
But they must have gotten an angry letter from an Amish lawyer, so instead of saying this is a century-old formula invented by the Amish, they now subtly changed the wording to say it was “crafted using age-old practices”. Because it’s called “Amish Secret Handmade” and has an emblem on the website that that says “Fine Craftsmanship/Amish Heritage” you’re supposed to assume it was made by the Amish. (But we all know what happens when you assume...)
What Amish Secret Is
They won’t tell us! I guess that’s why it’s called “Amish Secret”...
What They Say Amish Secret Does
They claim Amish secret is the remedy to a problem you probably didn’t know existed – waxy buildup on furniture from using leading furniture brands. They say Amish Secret is non-greasy and cuts through this layer of wax, restoring the natural beauty of the wood. They claim it works on all types of wood furniture or floors, including cherry, oak, maple, walnut, and even exotic woods. They brag it will cut through kitchen cabinet grease in seconds and works on painted surfaces. They add it will protect as well as keep it from collecting dust longer.
Amish Secret includes:
- Amish Secret Handmade Wood Polish
- Second bottle with floor nozzle (extra S&H)
- Amish Secret Furniture Repair Markers (extra S&H)
The Amish Secret Costs:
$10 plus $7.99 shpping = $17.99. If you want the extra bottle and some furniture repair markers, add another $7.99 in shipping fees. Grand total: $25.98 (plus tax, if any).
The Telebrands “Secret”
All Telebrands products claim to have a 30-day money back guarantee. However, with products like these that are consumable, they are only returnable if unopened. PLUS, you must take the time to write a “detailed explanation” about why Amish Secret sucked, or they could ix-nay your efund-ray.
Bottom Line: Is Amish Secret a Scam?
Amish Secret contains unknown ingredients, has expensive shipping and handling, and there is no refund if it is opened. That means if you buy it, try it, and deny it works, you still are left holding the bottle. This may not necessarily be a “scam”, but it’s not good business and we suggest looking for a company that is more transparent about their polish.
Amish Secret - SSSSHHHH, what they don’t TELL YOU